Pls give advice to a friend of mine
A friend of mine wrote to me and said...
Dear Yuri88,
Just when I taught that my relationship with my boyfriend is real and that I can say that this time is true love…I guess im wrong, last night I ask him what would he do if some one insist of courting him even though his in a relationship, would he tell it to me? Would he do it? and his answer said it all “that would be my secret” “ill cross the bridge when I get there”, after I heard his answer my mood suddenly change, I told him that I have to pee…I did pee, but I also got into thinking that “does he really love me?” ”am I not good for him? Am I a bad partner? Is there something wrong with me” I mean he is open to the thought that it would happen and he will keep it a secret to me…it took me a while to talk to him, he knew that the tone of my voice change, and ask me what is wrong, and then the most stupid thing he could ever say is “are you angry of what I’ve said?” is he even thinking? How would he feel if I told him that! I lie I told him that im ok, I wanted to tell it to him but I don’t know why I dint tell him…that night I have made a decision that I should stop my self to love him more I trusted him but I guess I should not…I cant believe him just when I thought what I have with him is true I guess I was wrong…after he ask me to have a second chance I made my self contented of what I have, I stop flirting with other man who is way handsome than him, who is more interested than him, who is more mature than him, who will love me more than he could offer ….i disregard all of them I told them that Im in a relation ship right now and all I can offer is my friendship,because I love him so much and then you would hear to him that if that happen to him he would keep it a Secret?…BULLSHIT...
I thought that there is true love but I guess there is no such thing, there is love, and there is also lies and pretension. I could not believe that someone I loved so much and trusted completely could deceit me….
Believing in true love is no longer simple. Life would actually be easier if I were a cynic…all I have to do is give up.
I know what life’s like. Im not asking for a perfect relationship. I only wish that people wouldn’t give up so easily on love, that they’d keep on believing that something true and beautiful exists.
The challenge for me now it to believe in the good things in the face of reality….
i need your advice yuri...what should i do?
Irene skylark
hmmmmmm....one perfect belief of real fantasy dear...
ReplyDeleteSometimes if we are in love we often see only the good things, we forget reality. I think Irene's bf tell not a lie, he is just a practical person that didn't know for sure what gonna happen soon.
I'm not saying it's a good answer from a BF but at least you can wake up from a long dreaming fantasy...life, love is like a game you need to gamble and take a deep good shot to it!
Just my two cents here yuri!!!!
by lady top
ohhhh............
ReplyDelete" don't cry b'coz its over , smile b'coz it happened...life must go on ! ! !
Irene ajah !
by dynamite77
Irene,
ReplyDeleteDont you think you are just ever reacting from the whole situation?...if you really trust your man you wouldn't ask that question in the first place. And just because you didnt get the right answer you wanted you suddenly felt indifferent. Have you ever tried to think of reversing the situation? You probably would be fuming mad for asking him that. I know we need constant assurance but there are certain things to get and find the assurance we all wanted to have.
Quoting you on that second chance thingy...i dont have a full info but having said that...that should have been so enough for you to believe on your relationship. He might not have a full intentions of hurting your feelings but thats what we feel when we dont get the exact assurance or response that we wanted to hear.
You should trust your partner more than anything. Dont you think it will be too shallow to end and not love and trust your partner with one stupid remark????...is that where you are trying to base your relationship???...if you reverse the situation...it hurts more than anything.
You definitely need a lot of contemplating and pls dont be adamant to balance whats in your head and heart. Also remember that the more we ask for assurance the more we will insecure about our relationship and it can end what is maybe supposedly the most beautiful you will have.
And if you decide to go out of the relationship...dont fret and always remember that your life should not end when your heart is broken. learn to forgive and then move on and heal. Next time you love..learn to be more secure.
Good luck.
by
Tonee