Love will...

Love will lead you back, hmm really? I mean what if love lead you back and the person you go back into already moved on or its too late to be together again? What if you’ve waited for so long and hope that someday he will come back to you but it never happen… question that only time can answer…

I personaly hope that the message of this song will happen to me, that one day he will come back to me and he will say how he misses me that he still love me despite of all the things that had happen. Just thinking of it makes heart burst with so much emotion. But I know in reality it will never happen, im realty hoping that he will back to me but I know that he already move on and now in the arms of his new partner and they are happy…Im really hurting because I still love him, he is the first guy who I really took seriously and in the end will just give up on me that easily…it took me how many months to move on but up until now, im still hoping that Love will lead him back to my arms, were he belong…

I hate this, I don’t wanna write stuff about him anymore, I promise that one day if ever that destiny will give us the chance to cross path I will be better than before, that I’m successful and with more good looks and good physique… I know that he don’t go for looks but I also want to improve not only for him but also to my self…that one day I will say to him this is the guy now that you left along time ago and now im rockin!

Am I that selfish because I only look on his fault? Maybe I also have some defect like my mood swing and my capacity to make a small issue a really big one. But im not like that alll the time, I mean im only like that if I know im right…my be I should learn how to control my moods. I cant help to think that somehow its my fault why we break up.

I don’t want to torture my self anymore, I WANT TO MOVE ON, I WANT TO FIND SOME ONE THAT I CAN LOVE AND WILL LOVE MY AND WILL UNDERSTAND AND ACCEPT ME FOR WHO I AM AND I’LL ASLO DO THE SAME…

i Pass!!

Geez I thought that I will fail my conversion to day but thank God I was able to have a passing score, I was about to give out but when I change my tone of voice and make it sexy jeje I got them!!! Jejeje

This job can really get the shit out of you, it will make you happy if you have good conversion and can really bring your world down if you have a very low conversion, but that’s the challenge of life and work, I mean all job is hard…right? Well come to think of it you have the easiest job that would be very boring coz there is no challenge and no chance to improve your self…so I should stop complaining, sumhow this job really help me to deal with the customer and it improves me =)…

This week I will have my new team, I will surely miss my coach ezzer for she is the best coach ever and she know how to improve you to be a better agent…I will be move to team jen, well I know jen because she handle me during my nesting and she is pretty nice, she’s a tier 2 back then but now she has her own team…
I wish I could be like her sumday…I wish..i just have to be good

wahehehe

Iba pala talaga kapag ang ginagawa mo gusto mo at nag eenjoy ka, hindi mo ramdam ang pagod ng work, samahan mo pa ito ng maraming masasayang ofcm8 at isang close friend na talagang jive kayo sa ugali...ang masaya pa nito mag kasabay pa kayo umuwi , im really enjoying life as it is, may mga araw talaga na hindi maganda pero at the end of the day, pag inisip mo, may matututunan ka din dun sa bad day nayon, God is fair may araw xa na ibinibigay sa akin na talgang ma rerealize ko yung mga katangahan ko and because of that, natututo ako...

as i said before this is the best time of my life , marami man akong pinag daanan na mahihirap na bagay ngayong taon i can say that its all worth it, i learn a lot, and still everyday is a learning experience...

enjoy pa kasi mag papasko na, pag nag lalakad kami ni ate cathy pauwi nakaka aliw makita yung mga xmas lights at parol ang cute wahehehe...ilang araw na lang! yey! yung ngalang sa pasko wala akong special sum1, pero ok lang njoy naman sa pagiging single, and as of now family muna...saka na yun...tama ba?...

IM LOVING IT....PAPARAPAPA :D

all i can say is...

i love life....

i love my job...

i love my family...

i love my friends...

i love all the ppol who is around me...

i thank you God for always giving me a reason to live and be happy and contented with what i have, thank you also to those ppol who you introduce to me bec they teach me and give me diff experience that can really help me to become a better person...THANK YOU so much God for all the blessings

so now i can really say that this is life and "im loving it"

***Our 2nd Month***

Our second mo.

Dapat kahapon pa ako gagawa ng entry eh kaso my final quiz ako so xempre kainlangan unahin yon, ayaw ko naman bumagsak hehe magagalit ang mahal ko (=()…

Hay naka dalawang bwan na kami and and we are doing great I can say that our relationship is deeper and more meaningful…waw finally this is the kind of relationship that im looking and hoping for, so xempre kailangan na alagaan at pahalagahan (tama ba mahal?) hehe…

Second time na ng mahal ko na maka punta dito and this time talagang na enjoy namin yung time namin together, nagawa namin lahat ng gusto namin…pero ang na enjoy ko eh yung nakahiga lang kami tapos nakayakap kami sa isa’t isa habang nag kukwentuhan ng mga bagay bagay about the past, the future and the past participle hehe…ano paba at xempre walang katapusang kulitan…

Alam nyo ba guys na ang sweet ng mahal ko? Ang gift nya sa akin ay napakaganda and meaningfull, that was the first time someone gave a present na talagang may meaning…gusto ko sana I post yung letter nya sa akin para maipag malaki ko pero xempre akin nalang yon! Hehe, ako naman ang bigay ko na kanya eh yung bagay na makakapag paalala sa akin na magagamit nya, so pag suot nya yon eh kasama narin nya ako hehe…buti nalang at nagustuhan nya talaga sabi nya sa akin na mahilig xa mag collect ng mga ganun and every collection eh may meaning and special experience…

Xenxa na mahal ha mura lang kasi yan dibale pag natanggap na ako dun sa work ko eh I can give you sumthing na talagang astig hehe…

Mahal ko thank you talaga ha, I know I keep saying this but im happy na dumating ka sa buhay ko, your really my inspiration…

Ayayaten ka! Kayat ko nga maamuam nga pampanunuten ka nga kinanayon!

You just have to make the most out of it...

Instead of making a happy entry about the good stuff that has been happening to me, maybe I should write the things that upsets me or the things that I wanted to do but I cant because of some personal reason and some other bullsh[i!1l]t stuff…

This morning my mom and I were talking about how hard life is, and how hard it is to budget money, then I kinda told her that if only I have a brother or sister it should not be this hard because I have someone who will help me in providing for the family, but what can I do, this is my destiny and no matter how I complain things will not change…then my mom, out of the blue said this “dapat kasi mag asawa kana para may katulong kana!” I can not blame my mom for saying that because she is starting to get old and she told me that she envy her brother for having grandchildren….the problem is I don’t know if I will ever get married…I don’t even know if that will happen…anyway while we were talking my mom said “ang dad mo nga naiinis pag nag pupunta dito si Curach, baka daw kasi nahahawa ka ng kabaklaan” and then the dreaded question pop out!!! “:bakla ka ba?” hehe…to tell you the truth I was really caught of guard, and my answer “Ewan”: hehe… that is so funny… hay! Right there and then I could have said yes and let it be ng matapos na, I am happy of what I am, at first I regret being like this but what can I do? Im tired of pretending to be straight, im tired of hearing the question bakla kaba?, I just want to be me, and there is nothing wrong if your gay or bisexual or what ever it is…diba? As long as your not killing or hurting someone ok lang naman diba?….and besides i am so happy with the relationship I have right now, because finally I have found someone who love me and really make me happy, I can say that now I know how it feels to be love back, not the kind of love that I have before that I feel that im the only one who is making the effort to make them happy…

I want to tell it all to my mom but there are some some stuff that’s holding me back…dibale sa sususnod I should have a straight answer to her question! And bahala na kung anong mangyayari!!!!

Mahal ko pag nabasa mo to pls wag mo ako alalahanin , don’t think about my situation here, alam mo nanaman to and I know you’ll understand…

Hay nakaka frustrate talaga…ganyan talaga ang buhay! As I say to my self “ you just have to make the most out of it!!!”

September 10 (a special day)

hay...all i can say is ang saya ng araw na to! as in...

today is the first time na nakapunta ang mahal ko sa bahay namin!
and i can say that everything turn out well...
so the long wait is all worth it, kasi kanina talagang grabe sa saya!!!
pero syempre kung ano man ang nang yari sa amin..sa amin nalang yon...hehe

ang isa pang kinatutuwa ko is that my mom really treat my love as if matagal na silang magkakilala...
my mom is so sweet sa mahal ko na parang my mom can sense na the person im with is special to me (hindi nya kasi alam yung relationship namin) which is great because before my mom is not like that to all of my ex's...(kumusta naman yon diba? hehe)...and you know what's really weird? after my mahal left my mom ask me "ano sa tingin mo impression sa akin ni...?" waw!
my mom is never like that to all my ex's (again hehe)! he never ask that question to me before!!! (kumusta naman yon! hehehe) at eto pa ang isa pang weird...sabi ng mom ko "oh pumunta kayo ng simbahan para naman makilala si...ng patron st natin para lagi sya gabayan sa pag punta dito! (san kapa!) waw talaga!...
the feeling is so good, that its so hard to explain...

mahal ko, i want you to know that i really, really enjoy your visit, masasabi ko na worth it sya, matagal man tayon di nag kita pero tignan mo naman kung gano tayo ka saya kanina...mahirap mag paalam nung huli kasi medyo bitin, pero alam ko marami pang masasayang moment ang magagawa natin dito sa amin...mahal na mahal kita....thank you so much mahal ko i really appriciate na nag punta ka and you take the time to visit me here despite of your busy sched...

thank you for showing me the positive effect of love...

AYAYATEN KA!!!